reX.'s rambles

november 19, 2000 :

2:23m

so.. here it goes mann.. another ramBle.. and today without another hoRRorsCope.. eVen though my old computer is getting more "stable" .. it's still fuCkin'g up maJorlly.. and a fRustration on top of the sHIt i have been feeling.. this morn.. as i took a cHance to download my email.. something happened where it crashed wHile downloading and now each time i launch it.. it cant.. cause it canT find the i/0? ..

oHhhh.. my tWo blonde briancells quickly return.. and boy are tHey sore.. !

just updated my reX.-a-day up to the moment i woke up tHis morn.. and mann.. alot of sTuff has gone on.. and me.. i have felt a little paralyzed lately... i put a major sTop and time out.. to absorb a little of what has gone on lately and to come to a conclusion of what i needed to do with all the "inventory" i have been also collecting.. ..

can you tell that i kenw certain sHIt wHas building and it wHas about to faRt all over the place..?

i felt like an open book even though .. i didnt ramBle.. and i hate tHat word fart.. so you know some serious shit flew with it.. if i use that kinda language..

i havent dove into reX.'s world ... as i have been dealin' with my own reality..

but reX.'s world dove into my reality.. and as always.. even without the communication of the ranTS.. people have made me think.. and have been really supportive of my mooD.y reX.'s reality..

wHat is neXt for reX.? .. miChael? .. it's more tHan a name.. it's who i am .. and even though i have felt a dark sPace surrounding me.. tHat person with a million names and realities has reacted to my "time-out" .. and faCed me sTriaght on.. "feel tHis" .. "feel it all.. and absorb.. dont miss tHis message.. and dont act too quickly to aVoid.. " ..

made me look at all tHis ugly sTuff about me too... tHe stuff tHat i try and hide with tHe right kind of hair gel.. or bleach.. or tHrough another's liFe of seX in a big city..

maNN.. i haTed myself.. i got anGry.. after i realiZed that i became a "victem" .. and now.. i becaMe responsible.. no longer under the influence of anothers creation.. tHIs dark . hole that wHas being dug .. wHas being done by me.. !!!.. im responsible! .. and i sTarted to hate the victem.. and being tHat..

mooD.y monday conTinues toMMa.. wHere not eVen the autHour of his liTTle mellow-dRama makings.. knows wHat will haPPen..

(well .. he knows a little .. bit.. more now.. )

reX.

baCk to reAliTy reX.