tHurs.day. septemBer 19th, 2002 You may experience some frustrations at home, and the situation may not be exactly as it seems. You could be seeing more of the bad side of the Moon than the good. A strong Pisces influence makes you disorganized and forgetful. Things will be easier if you let family members help you put it all back together. Emotional responses could get out of hand far too easily. Do not muddy the waters with loud words or rash actions. Meet challenges with all faculties operating at peak performance. Make sure you have all the facts before taking action.   (...a pisces ..huh? .. not a caprocorn? .. cause im awfully affected by that caprocorn right now.. emotions gambit!.. now wHere do i cHeck for the facts on all this?... cause i think i might act here... and baBy.. it wont be acting!...)   8:19 aM caSa de SLO... went and saw the doc weds before last... ... my cellcount is still good .. with my viral load at 19,500 and t-cells at 588... fuckin' A... yay!.. just went back in for some more "blood letting"... on tuesday that will give me some more recent results on my cellcounts.. i should get those results in about two weeks.. im still staying optomistic about how those results will come out.. and gives me more fuel for my homopathic approach.. so far .. so good.. (reX. knocks on wood).. and being poZ for about .. (reX. pauses.. ) geeeZ.. how long have i been poZ anyhew? .. i wHas first tested poZ in aPril of 2001 and am pretty certain that i became poZ a few months before that.. i think in noVember.. but i try and not think too much of that fucked up time.. it hurts to go back right now... and guess that's where my therapist will come in and help that.. so .. i guess it's been almost two years.. with the first coming to terms with it.. and the second.. learning about it... tRipp.. two years already?!... i find myself fortunate for the situation that im in... i hear so many stories about people finding out they are poZ. and having such high viral loads or low t-cells that they have to go on anti-hiv meds right away.. to me.. that is scary.. finding out.. then being medicated cause your body has been takin over .. too much i figure.. but what is too much anyhew? .. not that much for me to realize that i have survived two years.. and deep down i feel i have maybe another two years that i can work with homopathic approaches to keep my cellcount to where i want it.. before i might have to take meds.. my goal still is not to take meds.. if i dont have too.. i want my body to produce and fight off what it needs to naturally.. and to each person who has HIV .. it's an individual approach to what is needed.. mine is homopathic.. it's the option i have right now to be preventive.. and gonna dive into this world of my body and what it needs.. whitefeather told me that we stop really developing at around 33.. and from then we need to "maintain".. heh! .. i think i wouldnt have even known what wHas going on with my body .. unless something woke me up and said .. hey! .. get with it.. now i am .. "gettin' with iT." .. and again fortunate enough to not be at a point where it's too late.. or have to heal incredibly first to be able to maintain.. wowo! .. i need to get into the sHower.. get reaDy for work.. keep living.. and add another day to get closer to that 2-year mark.. now each day has a meaning.. more than it did yesturday..   being poZ for almost two years and my cellcount still is in goodshape where i dont have to take meds... cHeers! .. to another two years.. ! feeling goofy..   looking goofy .   . .           ow! kiTTy got me!.

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