8:19
aM
caSa de SLO...
went
and saw the doc weds before last...
... my cellcount
is still good .. with my viral load at 19,500 and t-cells
at 588...
fuckin' A...
yay!..
just went
back in for some more "blood letting"... on
tuesday that will give me some more recent results on
my cellcounts.. i should get those results in about
two weeks..
im still
staying optomistic about how those results will come
out.. and gives me more fuel for my homopathic approach..
so far ..
so good.. (reX. knocks on wood).. and being poZ for
about ..
(reX. pauses..
)
geeeZ.. how
long have i been poZ anyhew? ..
i wHas first
tested poZ in aPril of 2001 and am pretty certain that
i became poZ a few months before that.. i think in noVember..
but i try and not think too much of that fucked up time..
it hurts to go back right now... and guess that's where
my therapist will come in and help that..
so .. i guess
it's been almost two years.. with the first coming to
terms with it.. and the second.. learning about it...
tRipp.. two
years already?!...
i find myself
fortunate for the situation that im in... i hear so
many stories about people finding out they are poZ.
and having such high viral loads or low t-cells that
they have to go on anti-hiv meds right away..
to me.. that
is scary.. finding out.. then being medicated cause
your body has been takin over .. too much i figure..
but what
is too much anyhew? ..
not that
much for me to realize that i have survived two years..
and deep down i feel i have maybe another two years
that i can work with homopathic approaches to keep my
cellcount to where i want it.. before i might have to
take meds..
my goal still
is not to take meds.. if i dont have too.. i want my
body to produce and fight off what it needs to naturally..
and to each person who has HIV .. it's an individual
approach to what is needed..
mine is homopathic..
it's the option i have right now to be preventive..
and gonna dive into this world of my body and what it
needs..
whitefeather
told me that we stop really developing at around 33..
and from then we need to "maintain".. heh!
..
i think i
wouldnt have even known what wHas going on with my body
.. unless something woke me up and said .. hey! .. get
with it..
now i am
.. "gettin' with iT." .. and again fortunate
enough to not be at a point where it's too late.. or
have to heal incredibly first to be able to maintain..
wowo! ..
i need to
get into the sHower.. get reaDy for work..
keep living..
and add another day to get closer to that 2-year mark..
now each
day has a meaning.. more than it did yesturday..