NO JOB!! YET!!
a little nobody
that wants to be a great (big) somebody.
I can't believe
I am not working.
So undisciplined!
My downfalls.
All of them.
My other, and
first journal is finished. Now this is the only one.
My only one...
Kelly.
Sade is playing,
her music. My true love's music, Sade.
"Smooth
Operator"
Maybe, but
then, why do I feel this way? Do I really want to be alone?
Yes, just as
long as someone wants me. Too many people I do not know.
My god, where do I begin?
How!?!
With what purpose
in mind.
Am I a slave
to love?
"Your
love is king" (or keen?)
Kelly knows.
Knows a lot. My faults, my feelings. Knows too much. I
let her in, and again, I am burned. Why do I do this to
myself and also them? It hurts both of us. I DID let her
in. I invited her in, demanded her presence in me.
Why?
When I vowed
never gain?
"Come
in Kelly, and kill my monster of hate."
It was gone
but now it comes again. Haunting me of those I really
do love. He won't let me be hurt, and lies to me and tells
me;
" I will
never let you down again."
With
you in mind (or) With
Kelly in mind
and then...
Id,
Ego, Superego
...back...
